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here to share some parts of my life...some parts of me and my ne'er say die attitude..!!!! i love my life..my family and myself..

Thursday, May 23, 2013


Most of my blogs are related to my memories of past...
Though i am only nineteen and there is a lot to happen ahead but the things which are occurring or are going to be occurred are all consequences of my past..!
People learn from their mistakes but i don't!
And when I am alone I keep going back to the sweet incidents and times which have already passed ! Visiting the past makes me happy ..
conversations throughout 5 years...they are all i have!

"i miss u....
i miss u too...
u are my bestest friend...can't live without toking to you..
i love you...i love you too..

its being tooo much..you repeat the same old story everyday...
don't wanna tok to you go tok to ur other friends...bye!
* * *
tried but couldn't live without toking to you..
u are an addiction..
missed me eh??
a lot....
awww same here baby..!!
no matter wot happens your place won't be shared with anyone.. ever!"

and a thousand more conversations...(and a bright idiotic smile on my round face glows)

and then the sudden realization that the past is no more..it hurts a million times more ..it breaks me down..tears me apart.....those faded pictures of the past scroll over my mind...

i see my friends preoccupied with someone else..not necessarily boyfriends but someone with whom they can share everything to..someone they call a best friend........
and no i am not jealous!!!
but yes m hurt...there were days when i had you...there were days when every moment of my life was known to you...there were times when it used to pain u more when i had a cut....there were days when we were happy!

at times wonder why can't we forget a certain things!.
why our brain ain't a memory chip from where data can be deleted...??
deleting a five long years from the life ain't easy but i badly need to..
as these flashbacks are poisonous..
these are killing me....

Why I am the only one destined to suffer like this?

And hence I give up to life...it has won...it has finally taught me that 
no i can't have a true love..neither do i deserve a true friend'
friends are not to stay forever no matter how much close to you they are for a certain span of time they will eventually move away'

so life thanks for teaching me..though in harsh way..And now on i will be following your lesson...   

 love will just be another abstract noun..... 
friends will be momentary...... 
bondings wont exist.....
 relations would be superficial.... 


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